Childfree in the View of Islam

Lately, the topic of childfree has been widely discussed after an influencer openly expressed her choice not to have children. How is this viewed from an Islamic perspective? Here is the explanation.

1. Having children or not is not our choice, but Allah’s choice
In essence, when we are blessed with children or not, it is not our choice but becomes a decree of Allah ta’ala. Because Allah is the one who will give or not give. Allah ta’ala says,

“He creates what He wills, gives daughters to whom He wills and gives sons to whom He wills, or He bestows male and female genders, and makes barren whom He wills. He is All-Knowing, All-Powerful.” (QS. As-Shura: 49-50)

2. Having children is one of the goals of marriage
Allah has established the sharia of marriage, not just to satisfy biological relationships. However, continuing the lineage is also a part of marriage.

Allah Ta’ala says regarding the permissibility of sexual intercourse at night in Ramadan,

فَالْآَنَ بَاشِرُوهُنَّ وَابْتَغُوا مَا كَتَبَ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ

“So now mix with them and follow what Allah has decreed for you.” (QS. Al-Baqarah: 187).

Some companions such as Abu Hurairah, Ibn Abbas and Anas interpreted that the meaning of, “what Allah has decreed for you” is by having children (offspring) as mentioned by Ibn Kathir in his tafsir. (See Tafsir Ibn Kartsir)

From this we can conclude that the purpose of sexual intercourse is to have children.

The Messenger of Allah sallallaahu alaihi wasallam said,

تَزَوَّجُوا الْوَدُودَ الْوَلُودَ فَإِنِّي مُكَاثِرٌ بِكُمْ الأُمَمَ

“Marry a woman who is loving and has many children because I am very proud of you with the many followers I have.” (Narrated by Abu Daud, An-Nasa’i with hasan sanad)

3. Losing one opportunity for rewards that flow when dying
When death befalls us and it is no longer possible for us to do good deeds, of course we want rewards that continue to flow to accompany us in the grave. One of them is through the prayers of a pious child.

From Abu Hurairah radhiyallahu ‘anhu, he said that the Messenger of Allah sallallaahu ‘alaihi wasallam said,

إِذَا مَاتَ الْإِنْسَانُ انْقَطَعَ عَمَلُهُ إِلَّا مِنْ ثَلَاثَةٍ مِنْ صَدَقَةٍ جَارِيَةٍ وَعِلْمٍ يُنْتَفَعُ بِهِ وَوَلَدٍ صَالِحٍ يَدْعُو لَهُ

“When a person dies, his deeds are cut off except for three things: ongoing charity, knowledge from which he benefits, or a righteous child who prays for him.” (Narrated by Muslim)

Perhaps someone will object, “Isn’t there still ongoing charity and beneficial knowledge, or other deeds that also flow when we die?” then we answer, that’s true, but as a servant who is required to worship, he will take advantage of every opportunity. If we turn the question around, “Are you sure that his ongoing charity will bring rewards? Are you sure that our knowledge is beneficial?” Then we take advantage of all the opportunities that exist. If not from charity, it can be from a pious child or beneficial knowledge.

4. Losing intercession from a deceased child
In a hadith, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said,

مَا مِنْ النَّاسِ مُسْلِمٌ يَمُوتُ لَهُ ثَلَاثَةٌ مِنْ الْوَلَدِ لَمْ يَبْلُغُوا الْحِنْثَ إِلَّا أَدْخَلَهُ اللَّهُ الْجَنَّةَ بِفَضْلِ رَحْمَتِهِ إِيَّاهُمْ

“There is no Muslim who is left behind by three children who have not reached puberty except that Allah will enter him into Heaven because of the superiority of His mercy to them”. (Narrated by Bukhari, no. 1381)

5. Losing one of the ways to be elevated in Heaven
Entering Heaven is a great desire for us. In fact, when we get a low degree in Heaven, it is already a pleasure. However, the Messenger of Allah taught us to hope for the highest level of Heaven.

The Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wasallam said,

إِنَّ فِي الْجَنَّةِ مِائَةَ دَرَجَةٍ أَعَدَّهَا اللَّهُ لِلْمُجَاهِدِينَ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ مَا بَيْنَ الدَّرَجَتَيْنِ كَمَا بَيْنَ السَّمَاءِ وَالْأَرْضِ ، فَإِذَا سَأَلْتُمُ اللَّهَ فَاسْأَلُوهُ الْفِرْدَوْسَ فَإِنَّهُ أَوْسَطُ الْجَنَّةِ وَأَعْلَى الْجَنَّةِ أُرَاهُ فَوْقَهُ عَرْشُ الرَّحْمَنِ ، وَمِنْهُ تَفَجَّرُ أَنْهَارُ الْجَنَّةِ

“Indeed, in Heaven there are a hundred levels, Allah has prepared them for the mujahids in the way of Allah, the distance between them is like between heaven and earth. Therefore, if you ask Allah, ask for Firdaus, because it is the middle and highest of the Gardens. Above it is the Throne of the Most Gracious, and from it come the rivers of Paradise.” (Narrated by al-Bukhari)

It could be that someone is in a lowly rank but he is raised because of a child.

The Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasallam also said,

إِنَّ الرَّجُلَ لَتُرْفَعُ دَرَجَتُهُ فِي الْجَنَّةِ فَيَقُولُ أَنَّى لِيْ هَذَا فَيُقَالُ بِاسْتِغْفَارِ وَلَدِكَ لَكَ

Indeed, there is a person whose position will be raised in Heaven later. He asked, “How is this?” Then it was answered: “Because your child’s istighfar is for you. (HR. Ibn Majah)

If we look at it from the perspective of our religion with the many advantages of having children, is it still we do not expect his presence?

Wallahu a’lam.

Arif Ardiansyah, Lc from various sources

Source: pesantrenalirsyad.org